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I love you

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Sometimes every now and then, I feel paralyzed, not able to do anything but lay there curled up under the sheet/blanket holding a pillow or my arms tucked in ..

I cant get on the conputet to do any one of the number of things i want to do or am thinking i should be doing.
I cant wven write down any ofy ideas and thought of what id like to do
Or even what my thoughts are.

And i certainly cant get up, stand up, look up and face the dizziness i know i will feel or the mess that i want to clean up and have organized ..

Or deal with the weakness i know i will feel when I stand.

But I can lay there and repeat in my head.  " i love you".

You, the universe, my ex, my kiddo, my mom, my sister, her family, my dad, my family, the people who have come in and out of our lives in a supportive nurturing accepting way, all those who have accepted and allowd me to just be me.
Whp have been ok with me and my family just as we are.
Who have accepted us.. who have let us be how we are and even celebrated us as we are.
Those are the people i truly treausre..  those who have recognized in is something beautiful or something worth celebrating or appreciating.

Thank you.
Gratitude.     ...  Hope...  Love
Appreciation.  Gratitude. . Thank you.

I love you.

Orignally writtten 3:52pm September.. no i guess it august no October now.

Still wishing.  Still hoping.  Still praying.

10/3/19 1:53 pm

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